Crown of Glory 영광의 왕관 (True Father’s poem: 참아버님의 시)
When I doubt people I feel pain.
When I judge people, it is unbearable.
When I hate people, there is no value to my existence.
Yet if I believe, I am deceived.
If I love, I am betrayed.
Suffering and grieving tonight, my head in my hands
Am I wrong?
In the context of this poem this particular question is profound. Consider: When I experience genuine and justifieddoubt:. Am I wrong to want to stop loving, and instead, to think about what I am doing? When I experience having to judge someone for their actual mistakes: Am I wrong to want to stop loving and instead express severe judgment for their mistakes? When the only thing I can feel is an unmitigated and deserved animosity(hatred)forsomeone: Am I wrong to want to stop loving and instead assert myself in expressing the hatred I may feel? When I have been genuinely deceived?
Am I wrong to want to change my behavior so that I will never again be deceived? When I have been cruelly betrayed: Am I wrong to want to defend and protect myself when faced with a painful betrayal? Am I wrong to want to desire to seek revenge? The “usual” human reaction to such questions is: No, it is not wrong! I am not wrong!!!!! [This is what the “world” says!] I am not wrong to stop loving and think about things when I am really in doubt. I am not wrong to stop loving and judge someone severely when they really do make a real mistake. I am not wrong to assert my hatred when I feel it towards a really terrible person. I am not wrong to change my behavior so that I will never again be deceived. I am not wrong to protect myself when faced with painful betrayal. Doubt, mistakes , hatred, deception , and betrayal: these are the “stuff” of the world. This is what the “world” is like. You will encounter and have these experiences everywhere, from all sorts of people. You will be betrayed and deceived by many people.
I can imagine many kinds of people strongly affirming that they are “in the right.”If I am deceived, I have a “right” to become angry. If I am betrayed, I have a “right” to become upset. They will feel that they are “right,” and by any normal standard, they ARE “right.”.They have been betrayed, deceived, misled, and are in doubt.
They feel they are right; that is, that they are not wrong! I am not wrong! I am not wrong to want to protect and defend myself against deception, betrayal, doubt. This is a very defensive posture. It is a very defensive attitude; Excusing, justifying, rationalizing, never saying I am sorry, never taking responsibility Many kinds of people in this world have many kinds of fallen nature. We often “glory” in fallen nature; we feel comfortable with fallen nature.
People are of Satan’s blood lineage, and have his character: they are his children. If we believe in someone and are deceived, it is very painful. If we love someone and are betrayed, it is perhaps the most painful experience of all. It tears at the very heart. It is very easy for people to doubt other people. It is very common for people to judge other people. It is very common for some people to hate other people, especially those of a different viewpoint, religion, or opinion. Such experiences as these are superlative, are custom-made, for drawing out peoples’ fallen natures. Even famous people, held in high regard by society or the academic world, share these emotions. Sartre, Nietzsche, Voltaire, Marx, Dawkins, etc. These people held ideas which must have pained God’s heart incredibly much.
Even today, liberals (-ism), atheists (-ism), secularists (-ism), socialists, etc. They hold positions which are inimical to God. Especially against such people and against such ideas, seemingly we are not wrong to want to fight, and denounce and take revenge. By every appearance, we are not wrong to want to do something.
True Father’s poem illustrates the importance of a “moment’ in time.
This poem was written by True Father, but also concerns Jesus,
concerns ourselves, and even concerns God. This poem is the “cry of the ages” and
touches the very depths of being. This poem could express Jesus’ heart on the cross.
This poem expresses all of theology, and every philosophy that has ever been promulgated.
This poem expresses all human understanding, all human learning, all human experience.
This poem expresses True Father’s heart.
This poem concerns the experience of every one of “us.”
It encourages us; it shows the very essence of human life, what it means to be human; it
pierces to the very heart of the all-important “moment.”
ment of utter emptiness; a “dark
night of the soul,” and complete self-doubt, in which Satan wants to
pull us down into oblivion. Satan wants to keep us drenched in our fallen nature.
He wants to keep us as his children, with his nature.
Satan wants me to stand forth and say “I am not wrong”!
Am I wrong?........The long pause(afterthequestion)isthereal“moment of truth,” where I face eternity. Eternity awaits my decision ===è A decision only I can make.
Am I wrong? What feelings, thoughts, emotions, memories, hopes, aspirations surge through us in that single moment!
What will be our answer? God is waiting to hear it; Jesus is waiting to hear it; the saints are waiting to hear it;
The universe is quiet, waiting to hear my answer, which can only come from within myself.
Eternity is waiting to hear it! True Parents are waiting to hear it.
Our answer will determine whether we live or die, whether we go to God or to Satan, whether we go to heaven or hell. Our answer will determine our destiny. Live and you will die. Die and you will live!
This is the incredible power, the incredible potency, the incredible fate, the incredible intensity of this single moment.
But, not just any moment; but thisparticularmoment,asdefinedbythisparticularquestion: True Father asks: Am I wrong?
What will be our answer? What was True Father’s answer?
Finally, our answer comes forth, wherein, with complete self-confidence, I can make the affirmation that =======è “I am a child of God.”
Am I wrong? Yes, I am wrong. With confidence, I answer “Yes, I am wrong.”
“I am wrong” ==è means that no matter what happens ,I still must love. Even if I am betrayed, deceived, and wounded, still I must love. There is no excuse not to love. Even though we are deceived, still believe. Even though we are betrayed, still forgive. Love completely even those who hate you. Wipe your tears away and welcome with a smile
Those who know nothing but deceit And those who betray without regret. Oh Master! The pain of loving! [emotional pain, intellectual pain, existential pain, rational pain, common sense pain, any conceivable kind of pain a human being can experience] Look at my hands. Place your hands on my chest. My heart is bursting, such agony!
God told Dae Mo Nim: act with truth, without falsehood, based on fact, with sacrifice and love, and with diligence.
This is not just for Dae Mo Nim. This is for all of us. This is for me. But when I loved those who acted against me I brought victory. If you have done the same thing, I will give you the crown of glory.
In doing so, in loving, I bring victory. And in dong so, I will receive a crown of glory. Some people never experience such a “defining moment” as this; they are entrenched in the fallen world as Satan’s children. Truly blessed are those who do experience such a moment. For such a moment is what makes us most truly human, that is, what makes us most truly a son or daughter of God. No matter what, just continue to love. It is just that simple!!!